Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Dont Listen

If im restless, I tend to sing but since i dont know how, it hurts to listen to me but since i wanna remember things, I decided to uploud it make fun of me and embarass me all the way through. bwahahahah

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Crazy December

I've gone for too long because i needed to fix some stuff. First my computer broke for the nth time. i almost wanted to do this to my PC

but then again, all my lovely files and pictures are worth a fortune so i decided to leave it be. So i just bought a a new laptop instead. nothing fancy.

Then my phone asked for a replacement so i decided to buy this silly thing

Ive been very busy too, I was asked to dance during our christmas party and everyone knows i dont know how. this is what happened to that crazy idea.

I swear this december is really crazy. i feel like i've been spending and working and tiring myself until my body cant take it anymore.

Hays! life of a goddess is not all glamor and fun

Ok guys, wait for all the latest emotions of the goddess. promise to update more frequently.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

why this hate?

i've noticed too many harsh and spiteful comments within trans community. bwahahah i mean. i know there are alot of jaded ladies and men out there but cmon, there are lots of people coming here to find solace, comfort or understanding.i just hope we create that kind of community as well. and for those who are thinking of saying that this is not a place to look for that kind of consolation, well its your right to say it so go on, bwahahahahha.
and for those who hate me for no apparent reason. i know why you hate me now,. coz im rich, im sexy, im smart and i dont need to be a whore to feel wanted!

wait i just did it, heheh too much hate~ 

kissess~

(5) comments

pokerslut 12 Nov 2009 | 82 comment(s)
This is common and it is bad enough getting hate from the rednecks. I think it is partly because everyone's journey is different and people don't have enough understanding for others who are not as far along or have a slightly different urge.

I am always happy to talk to those who feel like they need a little support in private email if they don't want to share with the whole group.

Stay as pretty as you are.

kisses

Carla
Aidzzzter 12 Nov 2009 | 59 comment(s)
Well, in my own honest opinion, it could be three things:
1. Bitterness
2. Insecurities
3. Or worst, maybe some people just get some kind of sick pleasure in belittling and demeaning others..
Nicole_Nicky 12 Nov 2009 | 7389 comment(s)
hehe, thanks ladies.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Twit, tweet. follow me on twit.

Yes, Finally, i have twitter too. i dont know what im gonna do with it though.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

I cant sleep

Actually i was dreaming and in my dream, I was at work then i had asthma attack and i couldnt breath. Hayz even in my dreams, work is taking over! (hate it) Anyway here's a cute videos i stumbled upon>

The last one reminds me how i am after tequilla shots, bwahahha

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Trying to face my Relationship Demons

Only a handful of people know what happened and there's no soul on this world who knows how i exactly feel. I cannot tell anyone because im not ready to hear it coming from my own mouth. Eventhough the truth has echoed through my senses. I cannot deny the fact that when things go wrong, My crazy little self seeks refuge under the calming effects of his presence and i know i should not give him this much power over my emotions but realizing this truth is far more harder than denying it. let this song tell my story.

Welcome to a day of my life
The Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel
Welcome, Welcome, Welcome, to a day of my life..The Memoirs Of An Imperfect Angel

Though the lights were low, i could see you both
in a lovers silhouette
And my heart stood still, i was froze right there
staring down at her red dress
So i bolted out the door, jumped right into the car
it's too dangerous to be in the vicinity of where you are
Rolled down all the windows just so i could breath
can't believe you just actually did that S**T to me
I'm going 'bout a hundred, mascara running
Laughing out of anger, but it don't strike me as funny
Been to good to you , i've been virtuous and true
to have something like this happen in my own bedroom

Betcha Gon Know how it feels when i get you back
Betcha Gon Know how it feels and your hearts been cracked
Betcha Gon Know how it feels and we fade to black
And you see your whole world collapse
I'm gonna lalalalala laugh
I'm gonna lalalalala laugh
I'm gonna lalalalala laugh
Right in your face boy

Betcha Gon Know how it feels

So I pulled to the side of the road to fix my face
but i can't cover with make up what my tears want to erase
i wake up in a haze, morning dew and sunrays
As i drive i hide my eyes behind my black Cavalli shades
A block from the house, slowly creep in the driveway
Tiptoe through the door, but your there wide awake
Your like : Where you been?
I'm like : Sorry but i fell asleep on Jasmins sofa
I could have swore that RayRay called you and told ya
Your like : Are you OK?
I'm like : mmm, alright lil sleep and i'll be fine
But if you only knew what was in the back of my mind
already stung, but your really gonna find out in time

Betcha Gon Know how it feels when i get you back
Betcha Gon Know how it feels and your hearts been cracked
Betcha Gon Know how it feels when we fade to black
And you see your whole world collapse

This is for real, for real, for real
Oprah Winfrey, whole segment, for real, for real
20/20, Barbara Walters,for real, for real
60 minutes for real

Baby, i had all my trust in you and look at what you put me through You got me all crazy, somewhere down the line your gonna get what you deserve..you F*****G jerk
Your were supposed to save me, my sweet baby
Now we are fading away..but your gonna know how this feels
Even if it's the last thing i ever do
To be continued.......

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Fourth Of July

Imagine this backlog, This should have been posted after July 4th but im so lethargic so i'll do it now.

After a few months, I invited my new coworkers to spend time with me. (I used to invite coworkers to have a party out of whim but that hobby faded away.) This is the first time that they saw me made up for my party.

Just in case you're wondering where these pics are taken, My uncle maintains a small piece of land and he turned it into a beautiful garden.

Its a pretty place. Maybe I could throw a big party and invite all my friends. (one of my biggest wish)

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Tired of dating


I dunno what im doin here but im really not into dating anymore. maybe im just scared or maybe im in the point of my life where i realized  im ok being single~
hayz~ life is sooo crazy!


(15) comments

BellaDonna 14 Oct 2009 | 157 comment(s)

Nik, that is when you know that you are ready to be with someone, when you are comfortable enough to say that you don't need anyone to complete you!
Someone to be complamentary to you is always awesome, but I think you are headed down the right path...
It is those times that you can embrace your independance and say that yes I am single and I can do this on my own, is when fate steps in and says, now that you got the point, you deff deserve somenone!
Good luck!! xoxo
faithanne 14 Oct 2009 | 1019 comment(s)

Me too Nicole N!  i mean really!  one date in 6 years is toooo much!  (act..  i was bad for a long time then 'chilled' ; )  being alone is actually pretty cool!   ya go out,  hang with friends then retreat to sancuary!....   there's no rules that say ya have to have a bf!   and meeting someone out somewhere kinda chills the drama!... 
villalr 14 Oct 2009 | 479 comment(s)

Im in love with Nachos . Thats all I need . I dont need anything else .
jerri 14 Oct 2009 | 195 comment(s)
Smiles........give it awhile, you will be ready to date again.   Life is a cycle, good days, bad days, good dates, bad dates.......just wait for things to get better for you and sure that they will....hang in there.
BlondeGodess 15 Oct 2009 | 286 comment(s)
Fuck dating, Wanna go shopping ? 

*giggles*
Nicole_Nicky 15 Oct 2009 | 7389 comment(s)
thanks guys~ nice to see all of you happy~
tgirlgoddess 15 Oct 2009 | 24 comment(s)

don't give up  unless u feel u must but as long as ur happy hun that is all that matters,  this dating game is not easy lol  kinda like ur a contestant on ur own  show.
candy_razor 16 Oct 2009 | 24 comment(s)
become aprostitute.. u get pay :D 
JustJess 16 Oct 2009 | 7 comment(s)
  Whats a date? LOL sigh. Oh is that where he screws you and leaves and you never see him again? LOL
Cantforgetme 17 Oct 2009 | 23 comment(s)
I have not had a date in a long time. wish i could get some action. your lucky but of course you are real young
JustJess 17 Oct 2009 | 7 comment(s)
  Me? lucky? what? I may be 28 but tomorrow ill be 50 and still dateless. How lucky is that. Im transgender how lucky is that? I hope that last comment wasnt for me?
jerri 17 Oct 2009 | 195 comment(s)
JustJess.....remember the saying about the grass looking greener on the other side of the fence..............and if tomorrow I was 50 well that would be OK with me........lol, I am 53......
Nicole_Nicky 17 Oct 2009 | 7389 comment(s)
bwahahha, you girls are funny~ bwahahahha