i experienced my first bully

November 11 2009,

WHY THIS HATE?

i've noticed too many harsh and spiteful comments within trans community. bwahahah i mean. i know there are alot of jaded ladies and men out there but cmon, there are lots of people coming here to find solace, comfort or understanding. I just hope we create that kind of community as well. and for those who are thinking of saying that this is not a place to look for that kind of consolation, well its your right to say it so go on, I wont bitch about that bwahahahahha. and for those who hate me for no apparent reason. i know why you hate me now,. coz im rich, im sexy, im smart and i dont need to be a whore to feel wanted! wait i just did it, heheh too much hate~

This was a blog post i had that i should have remembered.

February 4 2011. Present Day

I was being friendly when this guy sent me an email asking me what's the point of being friends if we dont live in the same country. He even gave me an advice that i shouldnt try to be a woman since im ugly as one.

I said thanks for the advice and i tried to move on.

I must admit i really was hurt so i went to my girls to try to get some kind of support. thinking as a woman of trangender experience they would understand. I was wrong coz this woman affirmed his comment saying that as a lady boy, i am sure ugly.

All my life i was raised protected from the harsh realities of life although of course i wasnt spared from the subtle and constant discrimination that people of transgender experience face everyday but i still consider myself as lucky since i have my family and friends to protect, love and understand me. It was my first taste of bullies and i felt the pain. Now i couldnt imagine the life of those people who had to face these bullies on a daily basis. My heart goes out to them.

Now i learned my lesson.

"My being should not depend on how many people think im beautiful coz i should already know that i am!"