Screwed up

Were talking again, its not as intense and substancial as before but at least i get to talk to him. I know this might be my nuts self talking but i kindda sense that he has grown cold towards me, cant blame him though if every single minute in our conversation i would let my insecurity get a hold of our conversation.My emotions was raging while we talk but i managed to control myself, and then boom, every cell in my crazy mind whispered that his fondness on me has waned. i try not to think that way but i cant help it.

i usually dont entertain other men but this time i needed a diversion to take my mind of my craziness. so i tried talking with other men and just like what my baby told me, its hard to compare coz my baby is simple incomparable.

i am usually guarded when it comes to men trying to hook up with me, coz their friendliness is usually libido driven. but this time it's different. He has this way of talking to me that makes me feel so comfortable about the whole sex thing and unlike with others that i cringe when it comes to sex talks, with him i usually initiate it.

Hun, i know that you might think of me differently now. you may think that i've changed or i have shown my true unstable self to you that makes you think to reconsider pursuing what we share.

I must admit i have been very volatile and emotional towards you lately. I know i can never force you into doing things that you think is too early to even imagine but my acts has been fueled by my desire to make you happy and be with you. i thought your hapiness lies with me. now i realized that what lies with me is my happiness. and my happiness alone.

NICOLE "the biggest drama queen"

hahaha try ko lang kayo nman~

Current mood:throwing everything on the wind